I sit here and my wife is loosing her battle. Don't know if the end is near or not. When she gets so weak she can't walk and does not want to eat. When she has no desire to go to the doctor. When she sleeps or lays in the dark all day and night. I feel she has little time left on this side of the grass.
Over the years we have been very active in a number of churches. Now of course we are not. It seems now in this time we would have people around us. I would think that some would care to lend empathy or sympathy or even a hand once in a while.
It must be our fault. No one is here. We are alone. I even asked my pastor to call my wife before or around Christmas. No call. Makes me wonder.
It seems it is easy to use someone as long a health and desire are strong but let it wane and you are non-existent.
I fear I am as guilty as any other. I used to be a deacon. It was easy for me to rationalize not visiting someone, or not calling them. Now we are on the other side.
I wait for my wife to get better or pass and then find a group or church where I can be about serving my God. For now I am serving Him by caring for my wife. Even though it would be nice not to feel so alone.
1 comment:
Sometimes we can be so self analytical that we miss the focus of the day, year or life.
I am very much in your corner even though geography separates us.
I am another guy with not a lot of answers, but an abundance of questions.
You are my brother, I smile because of that, and then I laugh because there is nothing you can do about it.
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